As I write, my man is on snowshoes in the middle of the wilderness.
It’s my personal opinion that if God wanted us to climb in the snow, He would have equipped us with lots of fur and very large feet.
Now it’s not that I’m a worrier. Let’s just say that I proactively take the time to envision any potential outcome and in a slightly obsessive way, process the dangers.
Like the possibility that a mountain goat will barrel across the mountain and eat my husband.
Or the distinct danger of a snowshoe malfunction and the love of my life sinking 20 feet into a snowdrift.
Or the fear of important body parts freezing and falling off at the most inopportune moments.
And OK, yes, there are the occasional visions of avalanches, crevasses and cliffs, complicated by mountain lions, bears and rabid squirrels.
You get the idea.
Of course I didn’t mention any of these wayward thoughts to my man when he got up at 4:15 a.m. to go climb a 14,000 foot mountain on this snowy May morning. I just kissed him and wished him a wonderful hike and fervently began to pray.
I get it. He’s a guy. He needs a little risk. But I also confess that part of me wishes he’d taken up chess or golf. I mean, there’s certainly an element of risk in pro chess playing (chair collapsing, bumping hands against the calloused knuckles of your opponent), and golf has its dangers too. Stray balls, the wrenched back as a result of carrying that crazy heavy bag.
But mountain climbing?
Oh, my love.
So yesterday, I was talking to God. And He had a few words with me. I was reading in Exodus when I stumbled across this verse: “The appearance of the LORD’S glory to the Israelites was like a consuming fire on the mountaintop.”
My man loves his God. And he’s told me how he senses God’s presence on those mountains. He prays for his children. He processes his pain and his joy and his future on those steep journeys.
So God reminded me that this is His time with Brian.
“You’re right, God.” I whisper, “But are you sure you couldn’t speak to him through a rousing game of competitive chess?”
“Yes, God. Sorry. He’s yours. And I’m grateful for his adventurous, manly heart. Just please, please God, keep him safe from the mountain goats, lions, squirrels, avalanches, cliffs, snowdrifts, freezing temperatures, wild turkeys and snow aliens…. OK?”
So here’s my question. Does anyone else struggle with this risk thing? Share your thoughts with me in the comments.